Restorative Solutions Consulting

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If Not You, Then Who?

When you go to college for teaching, you are asked to write about your philosophy of education.  Mine has evolved over the years, but certain core values have rooted me both professionally and personally.  If you were to ask the teams I’ve worked with in the past you would hear, “if not you, then who?” and “dig deep“ as well as “positivity breeds positivity!”  

In December especially, educators may need these reminders.  Our students who demonstrate some of the hardest behaviors require us as educators to dig deep into our skillset to find patience, and the courage to continue.

This work requires that you be all in at all times, there is no halfway.  I have countless stories of students yelling, screaming, spitting, or hitting me.  For a long time, I would come home from work with so many bruises.  I never enjoyed that part of my job, but when I was able to build a relationship with a student and work through changing these behaviors, that proud feeling washed everything else away.  

Ultimately, when students feel supported, cared for and safe, behaviors will change.  The value of building relationships with your students is of paramount importance.  This does not happen overnight and takes time and patience.  When working to change behaviors, you need to realize that it will most likely get worse before it gets better.

Why again is December so difficult?  Because children crave consistency and routine and December is one of the most inconsistent months of the year. We have a winter break, days off for parent-teacher conferences, assemblies, etc.  The “normal” schedule is altered including whatever changes are happening at home.  You also need to consider the pressure of being able to afford gifts or the increase in the use of alcohol for celebrations.  These factors affect us as adults, can you only imagine how they impact our children?

Continue to dig deep for motivation and ask yourself, if not you then who?  Who will help these students?  I know this works because I have former students and parents find me over a decade later and thank me for my patience.  This is what matters! The joy and satisfaction of knowing I’ve touched their lives in some way is what makes it all worthwhile.

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