How Do We Support Our Students Through the Holidays?
November and December can create stress and anxiety for our students.
As we move into the holiday season, it is important to remember how hard this time of year is for many students. As adults, we recognize these challenges for ourselves but can overlook what our students are thinking and feeling. Schools typically see an increase in breaks and attempt to create “fun” at school, leading to uncertainty for many students who depend on routine and consistency in their days and ultimately made worse by the pandemic.
As a teacher and school administrator, I would dread the month of December as many of my students would begin to struggle. There would be expectations and hopes of what the holidays could bring, but ultimately it created more stress and anxiety, leading students to act out even more. Don’t get me wrong, most students look forward to this time, but consider the students that rely on two of their daily meals coming from school and who will have to find another means to eat. It was sad and exhausting to observe.
I think about a former student who chronically was a 12-year-old boy due to experiencing trauma that no person should ever have to endure. As a result of this trauma, his behaviors were far from age-appropriate. Painting a picture for you, he would have outbursts of crying, throwing himself on the floor, yelling, and more; things you would see from a toddler when they are attempting to figure out boundaries at age 2 or 3.
We knew we had to approach him differently and utilized a strong team who would take turns in helping de-escalate him. Some days this would only take ten minutes while other days it could last for hours. Try to imagine the amount of energy and adrenalin it would take to maintain these behaviors for hours. We learned that a more consistent schedule with fewer breaks led to a greater degree of success in managing the behaviors. However, as November and December approached, the student recognized this meant less time at school and more time at home, resulting in additional stress and anxiety. Knowing this, we would front load that his schedule was going to change and relied on a “wraparound” approach which included our school, his family, and outside counselors and doctors.
Thinking about this story, as much as students with behaviors resist, most desire structure and routine. School becomes a trusted and positive place where they can feel safe as many of their basic daily needs are met. Please remember and recognize that holiday time is not joyous for everyone. I’m not sharing this to be a “Debbie Downer,” but to call attention to the work that needs to be done and what is at a stake if we do not take ownership. The needs of our children do not take a break for the holidays.
#standreadytosupport